Long Time No Post

It's been a long time, and a lot has happened since my last post. I guess the item at the top of the list is the fact that I finally had my hearing and have visitation back to normal with the kids. Actually, it is a little better than normal. Before I had to put up with Michelle and deal with her everytime I went back to visit them. However, now whenever I go back (which is set at every other weekend just as before), Michelle has to leave the house and can't come back until my visitation is over. The judge took the times I requested verbatim and gave me pretty much everything I was asking. I have no idea where she will go on my weekends, and although it might not be the nicest thing in the world to say... I really don't care where she goes or what she does. I finally get to enjoy quiet time with them without her interuptions or anything else. I had the first of those visits this past weekend, and it was wonderful. I will share some of that in a later post, but wanted to use this as more to catch up with things.

The second major item that has changed since my last post is my dad. Things did not look good for awhile, but he had another PET scan done and things are looking up. They don't think the spots on either of his lungs are cancer at this point. It's been a little bit of a roller coaster, and I know he is getting tired of it (we all are), but we are all happy that for the moment we are on a positive note and plan to enjoy that over the holidays.

Lastly, the other item that has changed since my last post is work. I don't really want to share all the ins and outs regarding that item. However, let's just say that I am thankful the job market is starting to turn around, and there seems to be a few good opportunities out there.

I'll try to get some more posts up soon and include some pictures of the little ones from the holidays. They are always so much fun, and can always bring a smile to your face.

The school play

The play was pretty funny this year. They tried to fit all of Greek mythology into 99 minutes or less. I actually saw it twice. The first time I saw it, they finished in just over their time limit. However, they were able to finish with a couple minutes to spare the last time.


I think Andrew was having a little fun and getting into his role a little bit. What do you think?


He had been shot and people were behind him talking about him like he was dead. He was sitting there saying "Hey... I'm right here, come on... help me up."


This was his big part. He took center stage with the rest of the cast around him. The picture isn't so great. The first time I saw the play I got a video of this portion, but it is too big to upload to the blog, so the picture will have to do.

It was a great play, and overall a pretty good weekend with the kids. However, I didn't know at the time that it would be my last weekend there for awhile. Hopefully, that will all be resolved soon, and I will be able to share some more time with them and create some new memories.

More bad news

I found out over the weekend that my dad's cancer is back. I don't have too many details yet, as I am waiting for another call sometime later this week. His doctor wants to review the results with another doctor, and then will get back to us as to what they think.

At this point, it looks like there are at least two masses that have been spotted in his lung, with the larger of the two being about 3/8 of an inch. Chemo has been mentioned, but right now we are waiting to hear what the doctors have to say after getting together to review his file.

I don't know what else to say for now, so I guess this is another item that I will have to try to keep people updated on as I get more information.

From bad to worse

I have had two separate hearings at this point, and no agreement has been reached in regards to the wonderful little protection order Michelle filed against me. This means that a new date has been set, and this time it is set for three weeks out and will be a half day trial.

I kind of like the fact that it will be a half day trial. It will force her to show what evidence she has (or the lack thereof), and therefore; I fully expect the thing to be thrown out and for me to not have to worry about it anymore. However, in the meantime, Michelle discovered that since they used a standard form for the order, and she listed the kids on the form to be returned to her... there is a nice little clause listed at the bottom of that paragraph that prevents me from having ANY contact with the kids. That's right, it means absolutely no contact with any of my little ones for the next three weeks.

I am currently on day two of that wonderful little time span, and I'm just not sure if I am going to be able to make it a full three weeks without hearing any of their voices, or being able to know what they are up to and how things are going. I can't believe Michelle would do this to the kids. I knew things would not exactly be pretty in filing for divorce, but I did not expect them to be quite this ugly either.

I will try to update periodically as to how things are going, but at this point, I don't know that I will have much to say other than... "I miss my kids!"

And so it begins...

Today was an exceptionally bad day for me. I know this has been coming for a long time. However, I did not foresee just how ugly things would get when it came down to actually filing.

I was served with papers today. When I first found out that I was being served, my initial reaction was a feeling of relief. I was happy in thinking that she had filed and I was receiving the papers for divorce. However, of course I could not be that lucky. The papers were not related to her filing for divorce, but were instead were restraining order papers preventing me from returning to the house and being able to see the kids. She is afraid that I might just put them in the car with me and bring them back to Omaha (I guess in retrospect, I should not have said there was nothing to prevent me from doing that when she was yelling at me last weekend).

I am certain that it is all just a ploy and a way to position herself in preparation for what is coming. I had told her during the previous weekend to expect her divorce papers to be served to her this week. However, although knowing it is simply posturing for the proceedings to come, it still hurts knowing that for the moment, I cannot return to the house to see my little ones.

I have called my older boys, and they have both stated that they will help me in being able to speak to the other two whenever possible. That helps to an extent. I am sure I will be able to get through this and that everything will turn out in the end. However, I am not looking forward to all the wonderful little things that I just know I get to look forward to before that happens.

Emmy's Haunted House

Em had a blast decorating her haunted house. It was by no means the neatest creation we have done, but you could definitely tell she had fun with it.



I love the black teeth in her smile. I guess not all of the black icing made it onto the house.

Johnathan's big pumpkin plan

Johnathan decided to put the big pumpkin from the garden to good use...

Vampires

The little ones had a blast this Halloween. My little vampire and my vampire princess made a killing collecting candy. They have so much of it, I'm almost glad I won't be there this week as they consume it. I'm sure they will be bouncing off the walls until my next visit.

Marching Band

This past weekend was the final marching band competition of the season. It is hosted by Ankeny so they did not actually compete, but performed as an exhibition anyway.

It's hard to believe how quickly they grow.


My senior - Johnathan


Andrew - sophomore

Finished!

I MADE IT!!!

It was a long cold run, but it was a lot of fun. Things were very hectic and packed in at the beginning, but it really thinned out at the two mile point. That is where the half marathon people made a left turn and we got to go forward, right up that fun hill that I was looking at on the maps ahead of time. I was thinking, not only do they only have to run half, but they don't have to run this hill either.

The next few miles felt pretty good, although I wasn't too excited about the fact that I could see my breathe for the first ten miles.

At the half way point I saw another surprise. There were Gatorade and water tables every few miles. However, just past the halfway point, there was a cocktail table. Yes, that's right. It was pretty much a full bar complete with anything you wanted. I didn't stop, and I didn't see anyone else putting in their orders either. Although there was one person that stopped just to see if it was real or not.

At fifteen miles, I thought to myself... "Well, that's two laps around Zorinsky, time to start the third". The funny thing was that about that point, we hit the trails and circled a couple of lakes in the area, so I felt right at home. The sun finally came out and the weather started getting a little nicer. However, being on trails and in the trees, we didn't get to enjoy the sun for too long.

There were people lining the path almost the entire course, bands, and musicians pretty much for the full thing. My favorite sign along the way was one that said "If was easy, I would do it". Bottom line, the spectators were great, and I had a great race.

I was pretty sore by the time I finished, but I finished. I had said I wanted to make 4:30, but would be happy if I came in under 5:00. I finished right in the middle of the two, so I can't complain with that. Having Lindsey there at the finish line was great. It really meant a lot to me that she would come all the way to Des Moines to watch me. It was the perfect ending to a great race.

The Countdown - 48 hours

Okay, I'm starting to get a little nervous at this point. Two days from now, at this time, I will be just getting started on the marathon. I had thought I was ready but I've been sick for about the last week or so, and I haven't ran at all since last Saturday. Hopefully, I will be able to get over being sick, and all of the training that I did prior to that will be enough to get me through it. I guess we'll find out soon enough.

On the plus side, the weather looks like it is actually going to be halfway decent. Dry, partly cloudy, and a high of 58. With the recent weather we have been having, I don't think I could ask for anything better than what's in the forecast. Let's just hope their actually right this time!

Emmy

I don't normally post much information about Michelle. However, I am feeling quite frustrated at the moment and thought I would share the cause of my frustrations.

Last night I called her at 9:30 and asked if the kids were still up. She said that they were already in bed. However, I heard Em in the background, so I asked if I could talk to her and say goodnight. Michelle absolutely refused to let me talk to her saying how Em had already been told to go to bed and that my calling was a disruption and went against what she had already been told. I tried to say that I just wanted to tell her goodnight, and that I would even tell her she needed to listen to her mom and go to bed. However, she still adamantly refused to allow me to do this.

I also asked if Carter was still awake and if I could tell him goodnight. Of course, she said he was already asleep. Then later, when she called me back to yell at me telling me how I should never call to talk to them that late, I hear Carter in the background asking for a glass of water.

It just gets to me sometimes. What's the big deal with letting me talk to them just to say goodnight. Eventually, with her yelling at me, both kids were aware that I was on the phone. So I think she got a little pressure from that side, and I did end up getting to tell them goodnight.

I just find it utterly ridiculous that she would be so childish about such things. I think overall I have been handling not being able to see them regularly pretty well. However, it is difficult not being allowed to even talk to them when feeling those sentimental moments and just wanting to be able to reach out and at least hear their sweet little voices and say goodnight.

The Countdown - 9 days

The Des Moines marathon is one week from this Sunday, and there is snow in the forecast for tomorrow!?! What the heck is up with that? I guess the chances of getting to run in ideal conditions are slipping away. Oh well, at this point, I just want to run it and be done. I need to get back to a normal routine, and it's simply getting too cold to be running outside on a regular basis anyway.

Even with the cold weather, I am still excited. I love the fact that Lindsey will be coming to Des Moines to cheer me on. We will go downtown on Saturday to pick up my race packet, and I will get to show her around a little bit. I can't think of a better way to spend the day before the race.

Pictures

I had some fun taking pictures over the weekend, and thought I would share some of the better ones.


It's hard to get him to stand still and actually give a normal smile instead of his classic grin.


Getting both of them to look at me at the same time is always a challenge. Especially when they are both just wanting to run and play.


Em was more interested in the little baby frog that was sitting on a nearby rock.


She was having fun climbing on the railings and trying to find some ducks.


Carter is always happy to pose and smile for a picture.

It was a beautiful day, and we got some nice pictures, but the best part was being able to spend the time with them and enjoy their smiles while they enjoyed the weather.

First Haircut

It was time, and she was ready and pretty happy about the whole thing...


It was just a trim, but being as she had never had one, it meant taking a few inches off. She sat and did everything exactly as directed.


Her hair is still pretty long, and now looks much healthier than it did. She is such a little princess.


And of course, we had to finish off with a lollipop.

October

It's hard to believe it's already almost October.

But the pumpkin in the back yard already looks like this...


And this was waiting on my desk this morning...


This year seems to have flown by. So many things going on, it's hard to keep up with everything sometimes. However, I love where things are headed, I love being able to see progress towards my goals, and generally speaking, I feel good about where I am. Sometimes even though you want time to speed up to get through the bad spots, you still have to slow things down in order to enjoy the good things and savor those moments before they too have passed you by.

The Countdown - 19 Days

It's getting closer. Only 19 days and 52 miles of training left.

I completed my final long training run yesterday, another 20 miles. It was not quite as good as I had hoped, but it was still a significant improvement over my last 20 mile run. Plus, I am now confident that I will be able to reach the goal that I had set.

The other great thing about that run is the fact that it was the last long run before race day. For the next 19 days, I will not have to subject my legs to that kind of distance. My long weekend runs are to be less than 10 miles, so I should be able to handle those and actually let my legs recover a bit before killing them one last time.

I'll keep you posted.

The Course

Well, there it is. At first glance, the first thing that pops into my head is "Wow, that looks like a long way"! Then, after starting to actually try to get a better understanding of the course, I started to focus on this section:



Wow, if I'm not mistaken, that looks like about a two mile long hill starting just two miles into the course, and it just keeps getting steeper and steeper until you get to the top. This is definitely going to be interesting. On the bright side, it looks like once you get to about mile 14 or so, it is mostly downhill from there.

On another positive note, I found out last night that I will have someone there to cheer me on. Lindsey will be coming to Des Moines to give me some support during this endeavor. It really means a lot to me that she would go so far out of her way in order to support me on this. It's just over three weeks away now, and I am really beginning to get excited and looking forward to it!

Zorinsky

I am beginning to get way too familiar with this place. However, I have to admit, adding the hot air balloon floating just above the lake was a nice addition to the already scenic view.

My final long run is scheduled for this weekend, and the plan is to do three full laps around the lake. That will be about 21.5 miles. I'm just hoping that the weather holds out and I can complete all three laps like I want to.

This past weekend did not go so well, and I only completed 10 miles of the 20 that I had planned, so it will really help my confidence if I can complete the full 21.5. There were reasons beyond health and physical ability that prevented me from doing all 20 last weekend, so it's not that I don't think I can do it. I just feel that I could really use the confidence boost from making the whole thing as planned.

I'll keep you posted and let you know how it goes.

Blogging

What's the purpose?

Well, the answer to that question can be many different things. Different people choose to blog for different reasons. Some do it to create awareness for a cause such as a disease, or a company they feel they have been wronged by, or to share their enthusiasm for a particular sporting team. However, the majority of the millions of blogs that are written on a daily basis are simply people (including myself) wanting to share some part of their lives with family and friends.

Anyone that goes and reads blogs on a regular basis should keep this in mind. No matter why the blog was written, chances are, it was written with a specific audience in mind. To that end, the reader needs to be aware of the intended audience.

I am not saying people can not read anything where they are not the intended audience. It is after all, posted on the internet for the world to see, and each and every blogger has the right and ability to limit their readers if they really want to do so. However, most bloggers don't want to do that. The reason for blogging in the first place is to have your opinions heard, and that can't happen too well when you are purposely limiting the number of potential readers.

Knowing and being conscious of the intended audience will help you, the reader, to be able to place the proper perspective on what is being said. For example, if a blogger is wanting to vent frustrations, chances are they will do so without pointing fingers and putting names, companies, or anything else directing specifically towards anyone. To the contrary, bloggers aiming to discredit a specific company, doctor, product, or whatever the case may be, will almost always be very direct and specific about the subject and cause of their frustrations. Please keep in mind, we are talking about the internet here, and there are millions of blogs and posts, so of course there are exceptions.

Anyway, I guess the bottom line is just that. It is the internet, and there is a little of everything out there. The public blogsphere is primarily made up of people simply wanting to share and get things off their chest. It is not a source for news or gossip. There is a reason for the saying "don't believe everything you read online". The blogging world is made up of people's opinions, nothing more.

I apologize for the long post. Have a good day, and happy blogging to all!

Andrew's Birthday

Okay, I wasn't there for this. It was a few weeks ago, but I just got it off of the camera and thought I would share.



He had a party at the park with a few of his friends.



Andrew with his girlfriend. She is a couple years older than him so she does all the driving. I don't think he minds at all. However, she is a senior this year, so not sure where or how things will go next year.

The Countdown - 26 Days

Well, it's getting closer, only 92 miles of training left prior to the big day. Fortunately, that only includes one more long run, and I'm supposed to do that this coming weekend. From that point on, its all just shorter runs to maintain. I haven't exactly been doing too well on my training recently though. However, I still think I will do okay when the day finally arrives.

I even got a new headset to take with me on my runs...


I tried it out over the weekend on a ten mile run, and it was kinda nice. No more wires to mess with and yet it is still just as light weight as what I was using before. Now if only I can find my iron-man watch that I seem to have misplaced somewhere, I think I have everything I need.

Running Alone

Oh well... I guess my friend won't be joining me for the marathon after all. It's probably a good thing anyway. I've done all my training on my own, so I might be better off this way. I can focus on running my race at my pace without thinking about anyone else.

I cut a couple miles off of what I was scheduled to run yesterday, but I don't think it should hurt anything. This Saturday is supposed to be a 20 mile run though, so we'll see how that goes. Hopefully I can stay healthy for the next few weeks and be able to complete everything as planned. I'll keep you posted.

The Countdown

Only 33 days left to race day, and according to the schedule I have outlined to get ready, 130 miles of running to do.

Blah, I'm not so sure I should have added that up. That is a lot of miles to complete between now and then. Oh well, I'm sure it will go by faster than I want it to. Plus, most of the miles will be in the next couple weeks. After that, I get to start reducing the miles in order be rested and ready for race day.

Another exciting piece is the fact that I might actually have someone to run with (for at least part of it anyway). An old friend of mine from high school is thinking of running this year. She has run the Des Moines marathon in the past, loved the course and the spectators, and said that she might be up for doing it again this year. The only thing is, she has completed several marathons and there is no way I could keep up with her. However, it would still be fun to see her again anyway. I'll keep you posted as it gets closer and the countdown continues.

A Great Weekend

It was nothing special. However, at the same time I think it was one of the best weekends I've had in awhile.

On Saturday I went for my second long run. I only added one mile to my previous distance, making for a total of 19 miles. However, at the same time I also reduced my time considerably. My leg was really bothering me towards the end, and that concerned my for a bit. It was the same calf muscle that I tore last summer and had to stop running for awhile. Therefore, you can understand why it was a bit concerning when it started hurting at the end of my run. It continued to bother me for the rest of the day, but I was still pleased with my performance that morning. Saturday ended with a nice dinner out at Biaggi's. Dinner was great and so was the company. It was a nice relaxing way to end a quiet but tiring day.

Sunday morning I slept in for awhile, but when I did get up, my leg was feeling pretty good. The day was nothing overly eventful. I did some minor cleaning in the morning, and then worked on some paperwork that I need to finish. After that, there was more of nothing special. Again, although it was not truly eventful, it was relaxing and very enjoyable.

The evening consisted of making dinner and spending some more quiet time at home. Dinner actually turned out pretty good this time and Lindsey and I were able to enjoy a nice quiet meal with just the two of us.

Like I said, nothing special about the weekend overall. However, at the same time it was a great weekend and I hope to have many more like it.

Best Buds

My little ones at the park today.



They are such a pair. It is so cute when they are actually getting along. Unfortunately, they are the typical siblings and are usually driving each other crazy. However, it is nice to see those moments when they are playing happily together.

Pirates

Yep, those are my oldest two. Andrew on the left, and Johnathan with his (ex) girlfriend on the right. They all dressed up for pirate day at school one day. It's kinda scary how fast they grow up some times.

Tree House

I had posted about the tree house before, and even shared some pictures of it. However, I also mentioned at the end of the post that storms had played havoc with it and the solid walls were simply no match for the strong winds that seem to concentrate in the back yard.

So, Johnathan and Andrew helped take down the old walls, used some of those parts to create a rock climbing wall, added a rope ladder to the back, and added four corner support beams set in concrete.

This left me once again with a raised platform on which to build some walls to keep the little ones safe. However, this time we decided on some open railings that would not catch the wind. It looks pretty simple, but it took me about a day and a half (and a nice sunburn) to get everything cut and assembled.

The little ones are pretty happy with the results though, and I don't think any of the storms will be tearing this one down.

A Long Run

My starting point...


Up to this point, I had been feeling pretty good. However, I still had to make it back to the car, so I decided it was time to turn around and attempt the journey back.


The path runs along the lake, so I got to see everyone having a great time out enjoying the beautiful weather drinking in the sun while I was starting to feel the effects of not having any liquid with me.


Okay... at this point, I decided it was a good day to listen to the proverbial saying "stop and smell the flowers". There was a butterfly garden along the path, so it was the perfect location to stop and do just that.


There were lots of flowers to choose from, but none of them looked quite as good as the water fountain that was there too. After a nice break and some replenishment of bodily fluids, I was able to get back on the path and make it back to the car.

All in all, I am happy that I was able to complete the 18 mile journey. However, I was a bit disappointed with how long it took. This was my first really long run though, and hopefully I will be better prepared for future ones, and things will go a little smoother.

Registered and Ready

For the Des Moines Marathon that is.

Well, registered anyway, and at a cost of $92 and the fact that they don't allow any refunds, I'm working on the 'ready' part. I have a whole five weeks left to get where I need to be. Actually, now that I am taking a different approach and simply wanting to have fun with it, I don't think it will be too much of a problem. Although, I will feel better about things once I can get a couple of long runs in. I need to get a better idea of what to expect when trying to run a full 26.2. To date, I have never gone past the 10 mile point, so it could be a little interesting. I guess we'll find out though. I plan on trying to get at least 16 in on this Saturday providing the weather is reasonably decent.

That's another thing that has me slightly concerned at this point... the weather. What if it comes down to race day, and it is a morning like today, all rainy and nasty? Will I be prepared and ready to attempt a full marathon in the rain? Hopefully, that is a question that will not need to be answered, and the conditions will be perfect. Hey, one can hope.

Anyway, the commitment has been made. I have my schedule of what I need to do over the next five weeks to be ready for the event. Now, all I have to do is follow through and have some fun on the way.

Stress

A cause for stress, or a way to release it?



There are many different ways to handle stress, and different people handle stress in different ways. For me, my outlet has been exercise. However, recently I have been toying with the idea of registering for the Des Moines marathon. Somehow, with the thought of the marathon, running became a new stress factor rather than a way to release it. I began to worry about things like, will I be ready, what kind of pace should I shoot for, will I be able to get in enough training time prior to race day.

The thing is, it is something I would like to do, and although I know the amount of time remaining to prepare is dwindling, there is no reason I can't meet this challenge without it causing additional stress. I simply need to keep in mind the reason I am running is for personal satisfaction and as a way to get away from the normal day to day stresses that life presents. In order to ensure that this does not become a source of additional stress, I do need to lighten up on my goals though. I am no longer going to push myself to complete within a specific time, but rather simply enjoy the fact that I am doing it.

I guess in typing this post, I have talked myself into doing this and will be registering to run the Des Moines marathon on October 18th.

Fun Week

Work is going to dominate my life this week. Not only do I get to spend two nights this week working, but on top of that I also have a ton of new projects and updates I need to make to existing projects and documentation due to my new director that started a couple weeks ago. Luckily, there is not a lot that is really required of me during the night implementations other than monitoring the work. Therefore, I hope to be able to complete the majority of my documentation updates during those times. This should allow me to keep my normal busy schedule during regular business hours.

Hopefully, it will be a nice relaxing weekend at home and I will be able to get some rest and things will return to a normal schedule next week.

Stromboli

My kids all love it when I make stromboli and I have gotten quite good at it recently. Generally speaking it is actually quite easy to make. However, I guess I got a little over confident, and decided to make some for Lindsey, Haylee, and Bennett the other night. In doing so, I learned a valuable lesson... not all mixers are created equal.

My dough simply did not turn out the way it should, and that makes making stromboli quite the challenge. I did manage to get it rolled out, all the good stuff added, and was able to roll it up and get it onto a pan for baking. However, it was far from my best work. Lindsey was extremely nice and polite about the whole thing and told me how wonderful it turned out, but the reality of it was that it simply was not as good as I had wanted to make for them.

I made some more over the weekend and it turned out like it should.


I had to bring some back for Lindsey to try, just to let her know how it is supposed to taste. Now, I think I might be making some more later this week.

Star Wars

This is what happens when a seven year old and a three year old play Star Wars and the seven year old gets the higher ground...


The three year old is always doomed to be the one to die.


Okay, it probably doesn't matter if he had the higher ground or not, but she dies so well anyway!

Odd but Nice

This weekend was a welcomed change from my normal weekend with the kids. At first, I thought I was in for a bad weekend because I was being told I needed to hurry home. Then when I got there, no one was home. That was a little frustrating, but not really all that out of the ordinary for Michelle.

Anyway, about 15 minutes later, Michelle pulls in the drive and drops off the kids and takes off. She never came in, and never returned for the rest of the weekend. She had not told me that she had any plans or anything. I guess that is the part that is so odd about the whole thing. However, without her at the house, I was able to have a really nice quiet relaxing weekend with my little ones. It was a great weekend filled with video games, books, snuggles, and tickles. Hopefully, this is the start of a new trend for my weekends with the kids.

Running

To give you an idea of how my running is going, I went and picked this up at the store on Monday.



Yeah... I know, it goes along with getting older. Hopefully, it will help me get back to where I can run with just the standard pain and fatigue one normally gets from running. Believe me, that's enough. I don't need any extra discomfort from bad knees. I'm not sure if it will help or not, or how long I will need to take it before I can feel a difference (if I ever will). However, I figured it can't hurt, and if I am going to have a shot at being able to complete a marathon, I needed to do something.

Back to School

Carter with his Transformers lunch box after his first day back at school...


He seemed very pleased with his first day, and loves his new teacher. I think it is going to be a good year for my little guy.


Emmy spent the day with her mom, but she was sporting her own backpack. She wants to go to school just like everyone else.


There are times when she acts like she is already ready to join them...


They simply grow up too fast!!!